A pair of concerts in just a few days — May 5th and 6th, to be exact — will bring Lady Gaga’s Monster Ball tour to an end in Mexico City. (Happy Cinco de Mayo, you lucky monstruitos!) She’s been at this tour for nearly a year and a half, and even if it’s true that all good things must come to an end, I’m suffering some pangs that this one’s time has drawn nigh. Not to worry, I’m suffering way more happiness and anticipation of what the future may hold, with the release of Born This Way on the very near horizon. And while I count myself among those who would encourage Lady Gaga to take a rest — she’s long overdue — I also count myself among those insatiable Little Monsters who are hungry for more, more, more. Glut me, Gaga. Just try. And so the month of May is shaping up to be an extremely Gaga-filled month. Here’s what I know — and I’ll add more if I have to.
April 26: Yeah, yeah, I see that I’m referring to last Tuesday, which took place last month, but my May with Gaga began then, with Glee’s “Born This Way” episode. I’m a Glee fan (though I fall far short of being a Gleek). I was in concert choir, sextet, and madrigals in high school and held the opinion then that I continue to hold today: Life should be a musical; everyone should break into song from time to time. And yes, I do just that. At any rate, high school was lo the many years ago for me — decades ago, as of this year three of them — and I could have used a show like Glee. I could have used a character like Kurt. Enough of that. The “Born This Way” episode wasn’t exactly Gaga-centric, but it was worth staying awake for. (I say that because my workload has reached critical mass, I’m bone-tired all the time, and I could have used a 90-minute restorative nap to prepare me for the work I did later that night.) The two highlights for me were actually Chris Colfer’s solo of the Sunset Boulevard theme song and the mall performance of “Barbra Streisand.” The full-cast version of “Born This Way” iced a particularly tasty cake.
April 28: Lady Gaga appeared on Ellen and debuted “Judas.” I had to work, had to, so thank heavens for YouTube. Anyway, I highly recommend that you watch not only the kick-ass performance of “Judas” (with Gaga looking hot beyond volcanic in a royal blue midriff-baring latex outfit — and need I add that she was wearing pants, pants slung low on her hips and with boot-cut legs) but especially her interview with Ellen, the whole thing, in which Gaga shows herself yet again to be a person of tremendous wry wit, intelligence, spirit, and sheer loving-kindness. I’d rank this one among my favorite of her TV talk show interviews.
This week, Lady Gaga’s video of “Judas” will debut on American Idol. Offhand, I can’t provide the date because I haven’t been faithful to my American Idol-watching this season (no offense to the new judges), but I’ll know by the time the show airs. I’ve written it before, but I’ll repeat here that I hope the show doesn’t butcher the video. They did a horrible job of hacking up Lady Gaga’s live performance of “Alejandro” last year, when she sang for maybe five or six minutes and they chopped it down to three to allow room for the zillion time-wasting dramatic silences preceding the announcement of whether or not a singer was safe that week. At any rate, get ready for another onslaught of Gaga/Madonna comparisons — no, wait, did the onslaught actually ever abate?!? (If I have time later this week, I’ll post a little something about “Like a Prayer.”)
May 5: Lady Gaga will appear on Oprah. That’s all I know about that. I think there may be some singing. Oprah posted a short video of a lipstick kiss on her cheek, courtesy of Gaga.
May 5 (new addition): I believe this is the night American Idol will debut the video. I continue to assume it will bear razor scars from inefficient editors. However, E! now reports that it will air the video “in its entirety” twice Thursday night, once at 7:00 p.m. EST and then again at 11:30 p.m. EST, followed by a new interview with Lady Gaga in which she discusses (among other things) the furor already surrounding “Judas.” (As best I can tell, the new video never made it to American Idol. I then assumed a ruptured relationship between the Haus and AI. Perhaps it’s true Gaga didn’t want her beautiful “Judas” hacked to bits; perhaps AI reconsidered showing the unseen and sure-to-be-controversial video during prime time “family” viewing. Nevertheless, all is not lost. Gaga returns to American Idol next week!)
May 6: This one’s about me. Along with a few other writers, I’m giving a live reading locally. Normally I’d read a short story or memoir piece, but last fall, I started work on what’s become an outrageously long essay about Lady Gaga, her meat dress, and DADT. I’ll be sharing a small portion of it with a good-sized audience, many of whom will be captive listeners, others of whom will no doubt find my work exasperating.
May 6: E! will feature a longer interview with Lady Gaga, to follow up their premiere of the “Judas” video.
May 7: HBO will broadcast Lady Gaga’s Monster Ball at Madison Square Garden. Expect many repeats throughout the month. Expect me to watch as many times as possible.
May 12 – 13: Lady Gaga returns to American Idol. The first night she will serve as mentor to the remaining few contestants, and if I understand correctly, she will perform the following night. Live, I hope. Uncut, I hope.
May 21: Saturday Night Live ends its season with host Justin Timberlake and musical guest Lady Gaga. I feel a certain nostalgia remembering the last time Gaga appeared on SNL, as it was the first time I made myself drop what I was doing (having fun at a friend’s party) to catch the great Lady on TV. I had no regrets. It was the first time I became aware of how astoundingly talented Lady Gaga was — I’m reminiscing about the silver orbit outfit and how it impeded Gaga as she took her seat at the piano, except she used that same wardrobe malfunction as an opportunity to demonstrate her comic abilities before resuming her many musical ones — and it was the occasion of Madonna’s surprise appearance in a skit featuring Gaga, a clearing passing of the torch (or sharing of it) from one great talent to another. I must also admit that I enjoy Justin Timberlake, whose comic sensibilities are nothing short of outstanding. I don’t think I’ll ever forget his SNL skit with Beyonce about the video shoot for “Single Ladies.” I don’t often laugh that hard. I’m anticipating something similarly memorable from the SNL-Justin Timberlake-Lady Gaga combination. Here’s to wishes that come true.
May 23: Born This Way is scheduled to drop on this date. Is it wrong of me to expect it just prior to the SNL performance?
May 23: Lady Gaga joins the ladies of The View. Found out about this one on May 22.
May 27: Lady Gaga appears on Good Morning, America, where she will open their summer concert series.
Ah well, I know I’m forgetting at least one other thing. May 9th rings a bell for some reason, as does May 14th, but I can’t remember what it is. But as I promised above, I’ll be adding to this post as I learn more. Here’s to the Merry Month of Gaga!
PROFESSOR GAGA 